Not that the heavy-handed "Cheaper" was a keeper, but at least it had the courage of its slapstick convictions.

Timed to get a one-month jump on the pre-Christmas arrival of "Cheaper by the Dozen 2," the Paramount release, which had been developed at MGM, could see some Thanksgiving holiday action from younger viewers who might be too sensitive for the darker "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire."

Taking its cue, but not the winning tone, from the original, which in turn was based on the autobiographical "Who Gets the Drumstick?" by Helen Beardsley, "Yours, Mine & Ours" charts the course taken by Frank Beardsley (Quaid), a Coast Guard admiral and strict, widower father of eight who runs into old high school sweetheart Helen North (Russo), a handbag-designing earth mother of a widowed mom with a wilder brood of 10 of her own.

Making up for lost time, the two quickly get hitched and combine their households into a mega-family that makes "The Brady Bunch" look like an ad for Planned Parenthood by comparison.

Needless to say, Frank's ship-shape philosophy and Helen's "Free to Be ... You & Me" approach don't exactly blend beautifully, and their unhappy kids hatch a plan to bust them apart.

Director Raja Gosnell, whose successful comedy credits include "Big Momma's House" and the "Scooby-Doo" movies, has a demonstrated knack for choreographing chaos, but here the film keeps stalling every time it attempts to change gears from kidcom to romcom and back again.

While Quaid and Russo display a nice and easy chemistry, their anonymous litter and supporting characters, played by Linda Hunt, Rip Torn and Jerry O'Connell, are squandered by generic scripting (credited to Ron Burch & David Kidd) and vanishing plot points.

Production values are appropriately bright, though the Beardsleys' supposed seaside home (complete with its own lighthouse) has shaky CGI written all over it.

YOURS, MINE & OURS

Paramount Pictures

Paramount Pictures, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures, Nickelodeon Movies and Columbia Pictures present a Robert Simonds production

Credits: Director: Raja Gosnell; Screenwriters: Ron Burch & David Kidd; Based on the 1968 screenplay by Melville Shavelson and Mort Lachman and story by Madelyn Davis and Bob Carroll Jr.;
Producers: Robert Simonds, Michael Nathanson;
Executive producers: Ira Shuman, Richard Suckle, Tracey Trench;
Director of photography: Theo van de Sande; Production designer: Linda DeScenna; Editors: Stephen A. Rotter, Bruce Green;
Costume designer: Marie-Sylvie Deveau; Music: Christophe Beck.
Cast: Frank Beardsley: Dennis Quaid; Helen North: Rene Russo; The Commandant: Rip Torn; Mrs. Munion: Linda Hunt; Max: Jerry O'Connell; Darrell: David Koechner.